Are You Ready if your Teen Rebels to Family Rules?

How many of us can look at a young child and think that some day they may yell and swear at you? We never did. However, as kids grow we see their imperfections and our own imperfections as parents. We know that there will be days we know that we love our child but also not like their behavior very much. It is true…being a parent is the hardest yet most rewarding job you will ever have. There will be times it doesn’t feel very rewarding though.

Like right now. Our teenage daughter has decided she wants to do whatever she wants. She doesn’t come home from school until 10 or 11 pm. She swears and smokes. She never tells us where she is, so we have to worry about where she might be. She does not listen to us or obey us. We have began our mission of Tough Love and it isn’t easy!

We lock up our valuables. We have taken away most of her belongings until she can obey the rules. We have contacted the local police to bring her home if she is hanging out at local bad spots. And we pray a lot!

We are hoping to find a therapist that can talk with her and get her to open up about her past. Her first 10 years in Russia were horrible. No child should have to live through that type of abuse. However, her past is now causing conflicts in our home. Anyone reading this know the best ways to get your child…adopted or not….to listen to reason?

Thanks for listening. Sometimes being a parent of a troubled child can be lonely since it is difficult to share what we are going through to others.

Deborah Mumm
The Adoption Coach
Everything for Adoption


One response to this post.

  1. My heart aches for you. To give your child such a wonderful loving home and have this kind of treatment in return is heart wrenching. You are doing the right thing with the tough love. No matter how much kids buck the system, they have to have boundaries or they don’t know where to draw the line. Many times they just need to grow up, but in that waiting process you have to pray they don’t get hurt, pregnant, etc. All privileges must be taken away and earned back. For certain withhold driving classes or a license. I’ve had a few friends who have had major problems with their sons. Two had them taken out of their home in the night to a camp out west. One was hooked on steroids from the gym and the other had been doing drugs. It wouldn’t surprise me if Tatiana has taken something in the past. My neighbors put there son out of the house, but he was older fortunately, so they were not liable for his behavior, you are! His mom joined a group of other women who were also having trouble with their kids, and they prayed together weekly. She believes to this day that is what saved him. He came crawling back a couple years later asking to come home and they gave him the basement (unfinished). Till this day he can’t eat a hot dog. He’s married to a wonderful gal now and has a little girl. Have you read any of Dr. Dobson’s books? Maybe he can offer something. Are there any groups in your area that have classes or meetings on such issues? I pray you can find help of some kind, but this is all I can offer you right now. I’ll let you know if I find out anything else.


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