Santa or Not?

Well, it popped up without warning…and I really wasn’t thinking about it yet. Christmas! My head is still stuck in September and suddenly the radio station Alex and I listen to on the way to school in the morning started playing Christmas music. Alex was thrilled! I quickly hit the button for another station. However, Alex insisted he loves Christmas music and that it made him so happy…we had to listen to it.
I admit, I am pleased we have gotten to a point that Alex now has fond memories of Christmas. It wasn’t that long ago he was 6 years old and had no idea what Christmas was. Kids in orphanages don’t celebrate Christmas.
Then the dreaded question I had put out of my mind came up. Is there really a Santa Claus, Mom? I gave my ‘safe’ answer, “What do you think?” Alex quickly said, “Of course there is a Santa! Kids who don’t believe in him, don’t get presents from him.”
My concern is that Alex is now 11. Yes, he is small for his age and looks more like 9. But he is 11 and in a 4th/5th grade classroom. Will the kids make fun of him if he says something about Santa? Will he be embarrassed? Should I tell him?
Part of me wants to have ‘the talk’…I believe in Santa. I believe he lives in all good people at Christmas time who want to make others happy.
Part of me would like him to believe another year. Alex’s first Christmas believing in Santa was when he was 6…so he missed the excitement the first years of his life. Plus he is our youngest…the last one to have fun with this in our family.
What do you think? Tell him to spare possible embarrassment…or let it go one more year, and tell him after Christmas is over?

Deborah Mumm
The Adoption Coach
Everything for Adoption
I’d appreciate hearing your opinion on this. Thanks!


3 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by twrighte on Sunday, November21, 2010 at 3:35 p11

    Debbie ,

    This makes for interesting debate , of course some are far left and some are far right … I will give my opinion but first let me ask you a few questions to ponder..

    What did your parents do ?

    Did it harm you in anyway ?

    When did you finally stop believing ?

    Was it on your own or did someone else ruin it for you ?

    Also When did your other children figure it out , did you tell them or did they larn it on their own??

    How did this affect you and your older children , I suspect it did not ruin their’s or your life or do any harm whatsoever ..

    I think once you answered these questions you will know the answer to what is right for you and your child .. And your future grandchildren ….

    Now my opinion is let it be , allow each child to come into their own , I dont think it entail any further detail .

    I have heard so many different opinions on this some were heated in a church setting (In my opiniion that is ridiculous)

    I am a christian and yet I see no harm in children believing in SC until they reach their own conclusions , I do believe they need to know what Christmas is in terms of the birth of Christ whom is the reason for the season of celebration … But to take away a childs joy of Santa to me is just not the right thing to do ….

    I believe there is a Little Bit of Santa in all of us young and old …

    Hope this helps ,

    Bob Wright


  2. Posted by Fr. Joseph McCabe, MM on Sunday, November21, 2010 at 3:35 p11

    Debbie and Dennis (and all other partents who have adopted children from Russia),

    One of the great traditions in Russia (even, I dare say in a few of the orphanages) is the winter story of “Ded Moroz” (or Grandfather Frost) and his granddaughter, “Snegurochka” (Snow Maiden) (who does not look AT ALL like Santa’s wife….

    Here are some links for those interested:

    They have a very important role throughout the Christmas (New Year) cycle in Russia, and are today at the center of many TV commercials, greeting cards, ice sculptures and ads — very much like here.

    You might consider sharing this story with them, or seeking out books on the internet or in a public library on the winter tales of Russia (a fascinating story in themselves).

    A child’s growth and development from the myths of childhood (Santa Claus, or Ded Moroz or whomever) to a more adult understanding of the role of myth in every society and culture (and they all have something like this) is complex. For some the myth is broken when they discover that behind the costume and beard is their father, grandfather, mailman or some other neighbor… More times they pick it up from their “wizened” classmates and friends who bust the balloon – and we all must remember that it happened to each of us at one time or another…

    Sometimes too for the Christmas tales, it might take the form of a more serious and measured look at Christmas from the Christian perspective to see how some myths were then incorporated as Christianity spread and “absorbed” some points of other cultures…

    Good luck.


  3. Dear Deb,

    This is another hurdle to jump over….you have definately had your share! I tend to agree with the first writer, Bob Wright. Just let it run it’s course and if he says to you….Why didn’t you tell me there wasn’t a Santa you can honestly respond with ” There is a little bit of Santa in all of us…especially those that do good for others”. Let me know how it goes!!
    Love, Carol


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